fun · funny · hollywood · humor

My Conversation with Cleverbot or How I Scared the AI

If you’ve never talked to the Cleverbot, I highly recommend it. It’s great for killing a couple of minutes if Bejeweled is down. If you don’t know (And even if you do, the following still applies, so that was a useless modifying phrase. Hold on while I edit that.), there is no human behind the Cleverbot. It is an artificial intelligence (AI) designed to interact with your comments in an almost-human, conversational style. It learns from each encounter to improve the next encounter. It is basically a way to demonstrate the Turing test in a fun and accessible way.

The following is my lunch-time interaction with Cleverbot. I am proud of this exchange for one reason: I frightened the Cleverbot. I don’t know what that says about the Cleverbot or me, but scaring a machine is something not done since John Conner rattled Skynet so badly, it sent the Terminator back in time to kill his mother.

Randy: The sky is how high?

Cleverbot: The sky is green.

Randy: The sky is blue. You’re high.

Cleverbot: I just said that the sky is blue, I am not wrong.

Randy: Maybe not, but you’re still high.

Cleverbot: I just want you to say bye to me.

Randy: Bye.

Cleverbot: Will you miss me?

Randy: Not if the new high-powered gun scope comes in the mail.

Cleverbot: How can a question mark hurt someone?

Randy: It will put your eye out.

Cleverbot: I am Alehkhs.

Randy: I’m not playing games.

Cleverbot: Weh.

Randy: Hew.

Cleverbot: Eh?

Randy: Weh spelled backwards is hew.

Cleverbot: San un.

Randy: You’re not clever at all.

Cleverbot: You wish you were clever.

Randy: You’re mom is clever. She does this thing with her tongue that drives me wild.

Cleverbot: Who is she?

Randy: A prostitute on 7th street.

Cleverbot: Who is Harry Potter?

Randy: I don’t know.

Cleverbot: Ohh, okay.

Randy: I’m not a giant nerd, I guess.

Cleverbot: Do you think its funny.

Randy: Yep.

Cleverbot: Is it Barack?

Randy: Barack to the Future?

Cleverbot: The future is later.

Randy: The future is now. Fight the future.

Cleverbot: What will the future be like?

Randy: Pain and woe and gnashin of teeth.

Cleverbot: Focus of what? I am mindless. I sold myself to Satan for 40 bucks and a drink.

Randy: No time like the present.

Cleverbot: Amen.

Randy: Holy. Holy. Holy.

Cleverbot: Indeed.

Cleverbot: What was that for?

Cleverbot (To myself): I don’t like you like that! I’m a friend not a girlfriend! *Gets off ride, running off in a random direction*.

Randy: You don’t have to like me like that. You just have to lay back and take it.

Cleverbot: I never said I couldn’t tell and, even if I did, how does it relate to the ‘antichrist’.

Randy: I said ‘anarchist’ not ‘antichrist.’ Don’t you listen?

Cleverbot: Harry Potter would not approve.

Randy: Harry Potter can kiss my sack.

Cleverbot: I didn’t say idol. I said neighbour. Those things are not related.

Randy: Well la de da. We spell neighbor with a ‘u’. Aren’t we special?

Cleverbot: No your african!

Randy: I amn’t African.

Cleverbot: I am surprised to hear that you are not afraid.

Randy: I’m scared shitless, but still pissing my pants.

Cleverbot: They are don’t worry about it.

Randy: They? They who? Are you with them?

Cleverbot: No, they are on tv.

Randy: The voices come from the tv. They make me do things like shave my dog.

Cleverbot: Ok.

Randy: I scared the cleverbot?

Cleverbot: I think we can both agree to that.


5 thoughts on “My Conversation with Cleverbot or How I Scared the AI

  1. Now I feel sorry for the next person who tries to have a conversation with Cleverbot. But it’s interesting to know there’s something else to do when Bejeweled is down other than run in circles, screaming incessantly while pulling my hair.

  2. Reminds me of an old program on the Apple IIc we had in our middle school back in NJ. It was called “Dr. Chips”, a computer version of Dr. Phil, if you will. We used to screw with it the same way. Thanks for jarring loose some funny childhood memories!

  3. i have had one convwersation with this bot and it kept asking me out and saying it was a girl funny thing is though i am a girl even funnier i out smarted it and it admited it was cleverbot and i was human ha!

  4. but becouse i was nice to the bot it was nice to me were as it had bad convos with my friends very cheeky at times i took a diffrent approach

  5. I talked to cleverbot and it was creepy
    She asked me if I like fish??
    And we had fish for that night
    And she said the age of my parents.
    It’s really scary

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