Merry Xmas 2009


Here’s a new carol for those who are still shopping on Christmas Eve. It’s set to the tune O Holy Night. Sing it with feeling.

O holy crap! I forgot to buy a present,
It is a night that I soon will regret.
I drove to the mall only to find no parking.
I had to park all the way cross the street.
The stores are full, old ladies hitting children,
They are sold out of everything I need
Fall on your knees! Begging for a discount!
O night unreal, The night when I screwed up.

O holy crap! Did I just punch that store clerk?
I better run from mall security
Forget this crap, I think I find a bar.
A bar where they still all know my name.
Now I’m so drunk, I don’t remember why
I came out on such a bitter night
Run from the cops! I can’t afford the ticket.
O night unreal. The night I went to jail

O holy crap! My cell mate’s name is Bubba
He thinks that I have a real pretty mouth.
The bail bonds are closed. I even miss my in-laws.
I wish someone would come bail me out.
I’m so drunk Bubba is looking cute
This ain’t right. I really should be home.
Fall on your knees! On second thought that’s bad
O night unreal. The night when I screwed up.

Merry Xmas everyone! Here’s to another great year to come.

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6 Comments

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  1. Would definitely be a Christmas you wouldn’t forget!

  2. I must have been meant to see this one. I got a Google alert about it (well, actually on my comment on Chore Man Creeps Neighborhood..) to the left of this thread. Odd that it came so late…or maybe timely?

  3. Downright hilarious! Merry Christmas to ya, Randy, and all the Barefoot clan!

  4. Charlie Bradley December 26, 2009 — 21:29

    ROFL :)

  5. LOL! Hope you and your family had a terrific Christmas and cheers to a fab 2010!

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