Advice · humor · Life · writing

Stupid Word of the Day: Retired

Maybe I’m over thinking things again, but where the heck did the word “retired” come from? We all know it is the golden time in life when you have enough money, you can quit working, but you’re too old to do those things you’ve been wanting to do. Still, it looks odd.

I’m in my prime-producing, work years. Does that mean I’m “tired?” Well, some days, yes, but most of the time, I feel fine. Should I be looking forward to being tired again, AKA re-tired? Sounds a bit depressing. Maybe my tread has worn thin from the road of life, and I need to be retired like an old pair of whitewalls.

All our lives we are tired and when we reach our golden years, we just get tired all over again…retired. This thought makes me want to hang myself. Can’t we come up with a better word? When I’m able to stop working, I want it to at least sound fun, even if I’m too old and decrepit to do any of the fun things I have planned.

“Golden years” is a decent euphemism, but we need one word, something short and sweet, to jazz up retirement (dang, there it is again). How about “recess?” Remember recess? What a bright spot in any grade-schooler’s day. How great would it be to turn 65 and get to have recess again, like you were eight years old.

Instead of a cruise, we could play kickball. Instead of buying an RV, we could drag out our old Tonka trucks and Matchbox cars, and play in the dirt. When I’m 65, I want to have recess. I don’t want to be retired.

Any thoughts? What word would you use to replace “retired?”


26 thoughts on “Stupid Word of the Day: Retired

  1. Commencement, mainly because I used to think commencement meant “the end” instead of the beginning. I like the idea of retirement as the beginning of some great stage of life, even though a lot of men seem to go bonkers when they retire, according to their wives.

    I really like that saying about how reaching the finish line just means you are preparing for another race – even though I don’t really believe that wholly, having seen enough road kill. Clearly, some creatures didn’t make it across the middle line of some road, let alone win some race. But maybe they are commencing somewhere else…and not looking like something out of a Stephen King movie. I wish I’d never seen Pet Semetary (isn’t that how he spelled it?). At least I didn’t read the book, except for that horrible part with the little boy. I would have the luck to flip to that section while randomly browsing in the bookstore and it haunted me for days.

  2. I agree. Recess sounds much better. I know that’s what I’ll be having when I retire, er “recess”. I will be living my life to the fullest, not lying under the covers. LOL Great topic. :-)

  3. Retiring only means you get a chance to work at something you really love doing or have always wanted to do. It doesn’t mean you sit around twiddling your thumbs until the cows come home unless, of course, that is your idea of a good time. I know many retired people who say they don’t know how they had time to work. It’s a transition, yes, but it doesn’t have to be a depressing or sad transition. It’s all in the goals you set for yourself.

  4. Hee heee haa haa , you guys have some great responses, I love the pet cemetery one and the road kill remarks icorn. Retired, yeah isn’t being tired bad enough without being RE-tired? Commencement the idea is great but the word sounds old fashioned to me,
    I am commencin, to go to work, I am commencin to go to the outhouse.

    Maybe Reborn sounds way to Baptisty. Relive is a health food thing.

    I don’t know maybe commencement is the best. Great article!

  5. “The Golden Graduation”

    Every time you go through a graduation, whether it’s grade school, highschool or college, you know there’s something big and exciting just around the corner. It creates a feeling of moving on to something better. That’s what retirement should be.

  6. Loving the post and all the responses!

    How about Vacation? You’re on a permanent vacation from work and can spend all your time traveling. I like that thought. I can’t wait unitl my VACATION!!! I just pray that I live long enough to see it and am still youthful enough to enjoy it!

    1. But getting “pushed out” is called getting fired. Retirement is making the decision, yourself, to put an end your career after a certain period of time. It’s just moronic.

  7. I have been trying to learn html using your handy guide. The above post is my effort. I’m not sure if it worked…

  8. Reblogged this on and commented:
    My Neurologist retired and for some reason, that prompted me to question why they call the decision to end your own career, being retired or to retire. Maybe I’m just nuts, but the word is damn stupid.

  9. Howdy! This is my first visit to your blog! We are a group of volunteers and starting a new initiative in a
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