climate change · Easter · global warming · God · humor · Life · rant

Easter is canceled

El nino?  La nina?  I don’t know who, but some Hispanic kid is messing with the weather.  We had 88F days here last week.  This weekend’s forecast is freezing with lows in the upper 20’s (F).  Why mention this?  Is this a rant about “global climate change?” (Note: the term “global warming” in no longer in vogue.)  It is not.

This is to let everyone know that Easter is canceled.  Why?  Because God himself wouldn’t get out of bed on a freakin’ cold day like today.  Sunday is slated to be colder.  God will be sleeping in.  The good news is if he doesn’t see his shadow, Spring will be here soon.

Now someone bring me the head of John the Bunny!  I figure since I’m blaspheming, I might as well go for broke.


6 thoughts on “Easter is canceled

  1. I wish this cool front came in earlier in the week. The family up North sent solid chocolate to Fla. but when I opened the box, it was chocolate soup.

  2. We were out in shorts Tuesday ,now we had to drag out the Winter coats again.It’s snowing here today.For Easter we’re suppose to travel to my aunts which is a good 100 miles or so one way.I hate going anywhere when it’s cold and snowy.Since Easter is canceled I can stay home in the warmth and cook Easter dinner.:)

  3. Where the heck are you living?

    I’m staring at about half a foot a snow and it’s April!

    But it’s interesting and good and it spells positive change.

    As Prince prophetically sang, “Sometimes it snows in April…”

  4. It’s cold-ass cold here, too. It snowed yesterday, sleeted the day before and the temperature has been miserable. I know it’s early in April, but ferfucksake. Enough already.

  5. Canceled here too. Red Rocks amphitheatre is too slippery, so 10,000 people will be missing the sunrise service there.

    Speaking of blaspheming, all good Christians skip to the next paragraph – I read this nasty but somehow funny in a goth sort of way greeting: “Happy Zombie Jesus Day!” Just good to get a perspective on how others see things, I guess. Kinda like that story of the kid trying to tell the Easter story, getting it right up until the rock is rolled away, and then “…and if Jesus sees his shadow there’s four more weeks of winter!” I guess to close this paragraph, I should quote Larry the Cable Guy, “Lord, I apologize… and all the starving pygmies in New Guinea…”

    If you skipped ahead, you didn’t miss much, but it’s cold here too. Maybe warmer where I’m going after that last paragraph. I wish everyone a Happy Easter, because for a couple billion people it is a very holy day!

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