Barefoot Scribbles

Finally I dance with confidence to songs

Archive for August, 2008

Stupidity at Associated Content

Posted by thebarefoot on August 30, 2008

Associated Content made great strides in the two years I’ve been with them. They’ve also made several boneheaded errors. Until now the only one that really got me riled was the damned interlinker. Their latest change has just stolen my joy.

The AC forum was my favorite hang out. Then some genius decided to fix what wasn’t broken. I don’t know who came up with the new design, who sold it to AC, or how they thought it was an improvement, but it’s a complete and total cluster fuck. I don’t say this because I’m resistant to change. This is the opinion of a professional web application developer. Let me break it down:

Usability 1/5
The only reason AC gets 1 out of 5 is because a zero means the site is down. Just being up gives anyone a default 1. The new AC forum is a bunch of folders within folders with no way to navigate between the 4 master forums. There is no tree navigation and at certain points even the header hierarchy links are missing parts of the path. I’ve taken to opening the master forum (well 3 of them at least because “AC Connect” is a useless waste of disc space) in tabs and refreshing from time to time. That’s too much damned work AC! Their solution? A subscription feature that will email me when something changes. Bugger off! I don’t want to wait for email, jump over to my email client, and open the mail to find out someone posted something new. I’m in the forum and I want to see what’s going on while I’m there. Besides, the email that I get is useless. It says “Click here to see,” but there isn’t a hyperlink. It might as well say, “Something is new. Now go try to find out what it is shmuck! AhHaHaHaHa!” I have enough useless shit about cheap Viagra in my inbox. I don’t what more email.

Intuitiveness 0/5
Web applications should be intuitive. A forum user should be able to glance at a forum list and easily find what they need. AC’s new design requires the user to have prior knowledge of the layout (folders within folders) to find what they want. Unless you think exactly like the dumbass who came up with the system, you’ll never find the right thread. The thing makes less sense than the Dewey Decimal system.

Features 0/5
AC included none of the features common to most forums. They have completely ignored the first rule of web design: “People learn how to use the web by surfing other web sites, not yours.” In other words, do things like everyone else so the user knows what to expect. AC has no “what has been posted since my last visit/refresh” feature like every other web site on earth. They don’t have “at a glace what’s new” visual indicators. For this you have to remember the timestamp of the last post from your last visit and do the math in your head.

Community 0/5
Forums, above all, are communities of like-minded users. AC has turned their forum into pigeon holes for simple-minded users. Why the hell do I want to go to the forum of a writer’s web site to discuss my aches and pains? But AC has gracious buried a “Health & Wellness” forum deep in the bowels of the new design. If I want medical advice, I’ll go to WebMD. If I want to talk about writing, I’ll go to AC. Keep it simple AC. This design does not foster the community. It segregates. The design encourages people to stay in one folder. You can’t be all things to all people.

User involvement 0/5
AC steam rolled this new design out without so much as a by-your-leave. The frequent forum folk have been giving AC suggestions for improvement for years. None of of these suggestions were included in the new design. Here they have a steady stream of input from the people using the software and they totally ignore everything, subcontract the design to some DeVry Institute dropout, and force it down the community’s throat. Not even a beta test was done.

Hope for change 0/5
After the rollout, AC asked the users, “TaDa! What do you think?” The overwhelming feedback has been “This sucks. It’s hard to navigate. I can’t find anything. It’s all confusing.” There have been dozens of suggestions made on how to rectify the situation. How high are my hopes that AC will listen? Not high. Given that they didn’t listen to us prior to the change and given that the only response to the current cries was “Give it time. You’ll get used to it.” tells me AC has no real intentions of correcting anything. They obviously spent a lot of time and money on this. There is obviously someone’s job at stake here. Whoever that is has to defend the blasted thing to the bitter end. Yeah, I’m eyeballing you, Darnell. I doubt AC would change at this point if Obama dropped by their Denver headquarters and gave a speech about the importance of change.

Maintainability 0/5
AC has always been a self-moderated forum. Their new design requires way too much overhead. They are going to need several moderators to keep the place clean and the newbies happy. Forum participation by AC employees has never been something they were very willing to do. Without it, the new forum will quickly implode. The experienced AC users who used to answer the bulk of questions are not willing to take the enormous amount of time to do so. My prediction is hundreds of unanswered newbie threads and ensuing user disgust with AC. People will leave in droves.

Overall Score: Cluster Fuck
AC has taken what was a cozy Rick’s Cafe and turned it into TGI Friday’s, only they forgot to install a kitchen or restrooms. So now that I ranted, what could they do to make it better? Simply put it back the way it was and listen to their community. I suspect this design is supposed to align with some bigger marketing plan, but not all parts of a company or site need to fulfill some larger goal. A forum is just a forum. Keep it simple. Keep it clean. There are dozens of constructive suggestions at AC’s disposal. The only problem is these suggestion were left in the AC forum and are next to impossible to find. Even the AC employees haven’t seen half of them and if they have, they’re being damned quiet about it.

Posted in AC, Associated Content, rant, writing | Tagged: , , , , , | 26 Comments »

Decisions Decisions or Why I want to Go to the Denver Circus

Posted by thebarefoot on August 27, 2008

I have a choice to make. TV has replaced religion as the opiate of the masses and I’m one of the masses. I have to make decision whether to watch the unending coverage of the Democratic National Convention from Denver or Lewis Black’s “Root of All Evil.” Tonight’s “Root” is “Red States v. Blue States” so it’s appropriate and confusing.

Do I flick back and forth? Do I depend on my “last channel” button? God no! They’ve pre-programmed that thing to bring up random channels designed to infiltrate my foil hat. Press it often enough and the photons will have you singing Liza Minelli tunes. There is only one decision to make here…Do you like clowns? If you do, don’t watch Lewis Black. He has a brain, but oddly is a Democrat.

Where we really all need to be is the circus. Popcorn, cotton candy, giant peanuts, giant hats, screaming children…you know, the circus. I’m locking my TV on the convention (yes, I wrapped my antenna in foil) so I can see the spectacle that is democracy, at least, as far as the bylaws of the DNC provide. You know they have as much accountability as your local Kiwanis Club or VFW? Sorry, that’s a big bubble to burst.

Thank God for DVR. Oh, did I say He’d been replaced? No, He just got better. Then he smote us with a mighty smote. But then again, we didn’t accept his latest prophet, so we deserved it.

This is just a perspective from behind the Good Morning America barricades where this was filmed.

Posted in God, Obama, democrats, election, foilhat, funny, humor, media, news, politics, religion, society | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

Personalized License Plates

Posted by thebarefoot on August 20, 2008

You know what I’m talking about. You get behind someone in traffic with a personalized plate and you spend 12 red lights trying to figure out what the hell it means. You veer from your regular path and follow the car 19 miles out of the way and you’re still scratching your head wondering if even the owner knows what the plate says.

My daughter got a personalized plate with her first car. It was INDROCK. She really was into Independent Rock Artists, therefore Ind-Rock. Someone pointed out to her one day that they thought she was a crack addict because her plate read, “I need rock.” She switched to a standard plate with the next tag renewal.

Today I got behind a guy who had “BLTROX” on his gas guzzler. I thought, “This dude really likes sandwiches.” I think I’ll apply for “TACONUT” when I renew. What? I really like tacos. Dang!

Posted in Advice, Life, funny, humor | Tagged: , , , , , , | 16 Comments »

Marketing Faux Pas. I Deserve a Double Chin.

Posted by thebarefoot on August 13, 2008

Here’s your random neuron firing for the day.

I guess I’ve been hyper-sensitive to marketing ploys since recently reading Corporate Mascots that Shouldn’t Be. The article pointed out seven corporate mascots that turned out to be really bad ideas.

As with many of my befuddlements, this one was a double-take while shopping my local Publix grocery store. I was pausing on the last aisle, the evil ice cream aisle, because, well hell, it’s August in Alabama and ice cream sounded good. I noticed a new line of flavors from my favorite brand, Breyers. It was in a bright orange, eye catching carton. Each label was embellished with curvaceous lettering spelling out the brand differentiation, “Double Churn.” Only at first glance, I swore it read, “Double Chin.”

Suddenly a commercial sparked in my brain. The fancy orange cartons were dancing in the freezer, beckoning me with siren calls of, “Hey Fatty McFatterson! Come get a box of fat! Yo, Fatty fat big face! You know you want some. Double Chin delivers.”

Of course, I didn’t buy any and now I’m all sweaty from laughing all the way home. I sure could use some ice cream. Dang it!

Posted in Life, advertising, fun, funny, humor, marketing | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 4 Comments »

Associated Content Scheduled Maintenance 14 Aug 2008

Posted by thebarefoot on August 13, 2008

Thursday, 14 August 2008:
Publishing tools and forums will be unavailable for 30 minutes on Thursday, 14 August 2008, from 9pm to 9:30 PM Eastern time, for database maintenance.

If you are time-zone-impaired, visit TimeandDate.com’s zone converter for your local outage time.

Posted in Blogroll | 2 Comments »

Nancy Pelosi’s Innovative Solution to Save Energy

Posted by thebarefoot on August 10, 2008

On Friday, August 1, 2008, the GOP House minority was calling for a vote to allow new off-shore drilling or at least a debate on the question. Pelosi instead called for an adjournment vote. The vote was 213-212 to adjourn for a 5-week vacation. The CSPAN cameras were turned off, the lights in the House were extinguished, and the GOP staged a sit-in. When Capital police tried to clear the press gallery, GOP Representatives intervened.

Pelosi’s act sets an example for the rest of the nation. We must save energy since we’re not going to look for new sources of oil. What lessons do we learn from Pelosi’s example?

If you don’t like the conversation, just leave.
Don’t like the topic? Think you might lose the argument? Already have your …

Like what you’ve read so far? Read the complete article here »

Posted in Life, congress, opinion, pelosi, politics, rant | Tagged: , , , , | 3 Comments »